Lila asked:
My boyfriend is 48, he has been smoking 1-2 packs a day for 30 years. I am very worried about his health. He makes excuse after excuse. Please, how have you helped convince a loved one in your life to quit?
AJoy420 asked:
I know smoking tabacco is bad and I’m trying to quit. I just wanted to know if I quit and then have a relapse, am I doing worse damage to my lungs because they’ve had some time to heal and then I go traumatize them again?
Dead Man Chest asked:
I have friends both male and female smoker. How can i encourage them or say something to them to encourage them to quit smoking? They are old enough to know that smoking is bad for health. I am a non smoker
tee2 asked:
I quit smoking almost 3 months ago, I am gaining weight and have been going to the bathroom alot less. I am trying to eat a lot of fiber, prune juice, less carbs, green tee, alot of water and not eating after 7pm. Why am I still gaining weight? How do I stop it? Please help!
Frank Andrews asked:
People who have successfully quit smoking - what characteristics do they posses?
Consider the following. Those who did stop smoking:
* Were very unhappy about being a smoker.
* Viewed themselves as too dependent on tobacco.
* Experienced smoking as having a negative impact on their life.
* Had a determination to stop smoking.
* Implemented action steps. They found ways to quit smoking and acted on them - (example: studied material that gave them insight and understanding which set them on a new course, tried quit smoking aids, researched ways to quit smoking, sought quit smoking support, etc.)
* Were willing to experience the discomfort of withdrawal in anticipation of the reward.
People who succeed have a conviction about it. It is like a “cause” that they believe in and so they “take-a-stand” for it.
You can take it a step at a time and follow your convictions if you are one of those who wants to quit smoking. There are also many resources available that can help you, as well as community support. In all of my writings, you will always hear me say that there is a type of mindset and a particular place of being that brings about long term success.
There really is a place of being that resolves around who you are. For the smoker, smoking is actually supportive of the very person that they are. There is an understanding about this that I hope will be discovered by those who want to quit smoking; an understanding that will give them a new outlook (or mindset) which will effect who they are (or will be) to some degree. Smoking is not just something that the person does. Smoking is actually an extension of who the person is. Can a person stop being who they are? Though the nicotine aspect of smoking is a difficult issue, it is not the “thing” that actually prevents someone from long term success at quitting. The concept of not being able to quit being who they are is the “thing” that prevents long term success.
So then, where is a solution? Well, it begins with the characteristics of a successful quitter which I shared above. A genuine desire to succeed must be there and this is not something that someone can give to another. It is either there or it is not. Also, for long term success, it goes even deeper. Smoking is rooted in developmental issues. As I said, it is actually an extension of who a person is therefore it is important for a person to consider personal development issues for the purpose of becoming a different person to some degree; a person who’s emotional support, identity, security and validation do not come from smoking. Again, the desire to be a different person, one whose emotional needs are not met by smoking, is not something that someone can give to another. A person either has the desire to be a different person or they don’t. In some of my other writings I explain in detail about personal development but for now I hope you can see that this is an important part of the process.
In the meantime, if you are struggling, then during your times of struggle and set-backs always remember - There is no condemnation! What matters the most is - Intent and Motive.
